Greetings to all from the hens of Country Hen Farm!
The humans on this farm have dubbed me with the name Priscilla Bradford, of all things. I have been told my name commemorates some event in human history where people reportedly came to this country by riding on something called a Mayflower. I don’t believe a word of that nonsense though. Humans have the strangest imaginations! I have never seen a flower in any month that anything bigger than a bee could perch upon. So I believe this story is the same manner of fictitious nonsense that spurred the hullabaloo with Esther Bonnie’s name. Some poor confused human made up this fairy tale about riding a Mayflower as an excuse to give me a preposterously unpronounceable name! Have you ever tried to pronounce the letters “P” or “B” without using your lips? Now try saying the letter “S” without any teeth. There, now you can appreciate how difficult it is for chickens to say my name. It is quite a strain on the beak.
Esther Bonnie has asked me to cover some of her spokeschicken duties for her while she does some investigative research on another strange human phenomenon we have recently heard about. Something called “Holidays” whatever that might be. I must admit that I am not as well versed with translating human language into Chickenese as Esther is. She heard some of the humans talking about making egg nog and taking time off to celebrate a “long holiday weekend” and she was determined to find out what this is all about. She told me and the other girls that she was going to have to experience this first hand before she’d be able to explain what it is to the rest of us. I certainly hope she does not work too hard at this!
While we may not truly grasp much about human behavior, we do wish to share the festive spirit they eggsibit during this time of year. Naturally we strive to be poultritically correct in all things and so Esther has asked me to wish all of your humans glad tidings throughout the eggsentric eggstravaganza’s you celebrate even though we do not fully understand the meaning of Holidays we all hope you have very happy ones and that you and yours continue to enjoy our exceptional eggs in good health always.